“They’re taking another quarterback?”
This is the first thing I heard while sitting at the bar — I mean, eh…coffee shop, when the Washington Redskins drafted Kirk Cousins just three rounds after taking Robert Griffin III as No. 2 overall.
It was crazy. Irresponsible. The non-rapper-indicating version of the word “ludicrous” even.
But here we are just three years later, and the decision to draft both Griffin and Cousins no longer seems irresponsible or ludicrous, or even Ludacris, for that matter. In fact, now it seems pretty genius. Because even though he was taken 100 picks later, Cousins has established himself as the best choice (on the current roster) to lead the Redskin offense anyway.
He may only have nine starts, but the guy’s got the supporters, and those supporters are the ones calling the shots in the nation’s capital right now (to clarify: I’m talking about Jay Gruden, not Donald Trump).
That’s great, right? Finding a quarterback to take the reins with such a late pick? You gotta love the underdog. The Russell Wilsons, the Joe Thiesmans, the, eh… Tom Bradys.
But just like getting Verizon to hand over Tom Brady’s iMessage archives, or keeping Joe Namath away from Suzy Kolber on the “Monday Night Football” sidelines after he’s been at the bar — I mean, eh…coffee shop — I’m afraid the situation just isn’t that simple.
There are contracts to consider, salary caps to figure out. And who’s gonna mail all those “Griffin/No. 10” Redskins jerseys to all those third-world countries?
Now, I’m still waiting on my guy at H&R Block to get back on the official numbers, but even without getting the exact figures I already know that there is one thing in the NFL that matters more than where a player was drafted, or how many Subway commercials he lands, or how cool his socks might be.
And that one more important thing is: Money.
Money, as in the $16 million the Redskins will be held accountable for in 2016 should Griffin get sidelined with an injury, whether it be during a game, during a practice, or — and I’ll have to check with my guy at H&R Block on this one, too, but… — while shooting a Subway commercial.
On the line for that kind of dough, and considering that RGIII’s probably been sidelined more times than Donald Trump’s brought up immigration this week, unfortunately, it looks like the only option could be to part ways with the former Offensive Rookie of the Year, and like the Redskins could be on the lookout for a franchise quarterback yet again.
Let’s just hope they can find one soon, because after 16 different starters in 16 years, it looks like Americans might have their next president before Redskins fans have their next quarterback.